Ok, so it really kind've annoys me how I write letters to certain people who live in Portland and they don't respond. They should be drooling and slobbering all over their computers whenever I write to them. Long pauses and silence make me nervous. They don't love me anymore, that's the only conclusion I could possibly think of. So the solution? Suffocate them with an endless barrage of whining complaints and a long string of letters with big puppy-dog eyes (in writing of course). And then fill up their voice-mail boxes. Then they'll love me. How could you resist?